personal, veganism

And I am already back to the grind

Hi blog!

I can’t figure out how to move my photo gallery so I am just going to leave it at the top of my post. I know some of the photos are sideways; I fixed them and saved them many times but WordPress hates me today apparently. You will just have to deal with some sidewaysness.

As you can probably imagine, I am not excited to be back at school. Nobody is (at least the people I have seen so far–apparently most people aren’t coming back until today). Break literally just started and I am already back again. The good news is that I only have two full weeks of classes left, then exams. And then I am off for a whole month with nothing to do but buy school supplies, get fat from Christmas candy, and find some volunteer hours. December 17, please come fast.

Here is a fun list of all the stuff I did over Thanksgiving break:

  • drove Eliyah home on Tuesday and played Heads Up in her parking lot
  • went to Moana!
  • went to Friendsgiving
  • watched a lot of TV and movies with my family (lots of This is Us, Crazy Ex-Girlfriend, HIMYM, Friends, and also It’s a Wonderful Life and the Grinch cartoon)
  • ate lots of great food on Thanksgiving that I helped cool some of
  • watched the Thanksgiving Day Parade on Youtube lol
  • went to see Fantastic Beasts with Eliyah on Friday
  • ran the Turkey Burn-Off with my dad on Saturday and we went pretty fast!!!
  • decorated for Christmas (and brought out our beloved fake tree Oliver!)
  • played Cards Against Humanity for the first time while eating vegan chicken tenders!

I did a lot of fun stuff but also got a lot of work done, because that’s what I do. I don’t think it’s too early to be studying for final exams yet (is there such a thing as “too early”?) so I did a lot of that. I also left to head back to college way earlier than normal because I expected traffic to suddenly turn insane at like 4pm, and it never did. But now I know for next year!

Here are some life lessons:

Life Lesson #1: People are liars sometimes

I am a big user of Twitter, but one of my problems with it is that sometimes it makes me feel like I’m living my life wrong. This feeling is fleeting, of course, because I know what works for me, but it’s still troublesome at times.

It started when I first moved to college and felt strongly that I was at a lengthy summer camp instead of a new home. My summer camp hypothesis was enforced mostly by the fact that, for my first week or so, I was made to do things and go places I didn’t want to. Events were mandatory; meals were planned. I know they were trying to make us feel excited and at home, but it felt very counterintuitive: why welcome me to my adult life by treating me like a 6th grader at outdoor ed? College didn’t start to feel like a permanent thing for me until I was given the independence to make it my own.

Anyway, while I was grappling with summer camp frustration, basically everyone I knew on Twitter couldn’t stop tweeting about how much they LOVED college. And I wasn’t there yet. I soon realized we were talking about different “colleges”: I see college as a composite of work and play, and my friends hadn’t gotten to the work part yet. Even now, their adoration of the collegiate social world makes up for the worst of academic experiences. So it’s not that they’re lying, as my title would suggest, but they are absolutely looking at and experiencing college in a way alien to me.

Another example would be the many tweets I’ve encountered that express confusion about students who go home a lot, wondering “why they came to college at all”. Well, my friend, I came to college to invest in my future and advance toward my goals. And because I am being housed with people who came for similar reasons, there isn’t a lot going on on the weekends. And all my non-dorm friends leave and do things I don’t feel comfortable doing. The gym and dining halls have weekend hours that assume early risers like me don’t exist (maybe we don’t). Why should I sit around hungry and alone for 48 hours when I could be at home? Home has amenities and comfort levels that college doesn’t. Again the problem is a difference in perspective: the owners of tweets like this see weekends at college as an opportunity to do crazy, risky things they could never get away with at home. To them, home is a place of limitations. To me, college is the more limiting (time wise) of the two.

Just yesterday I had an old acquantaince from high school tweet: “If you’re not beyond ready to go back to college after break, you picked the wrong college”. She is wrong for many reasons, obviously, but the most prominent is that her tweet asserts that I might be excited to go back to school had I picked a different school.  I have never in my entire life been excited to go back to school. School has its enjoyable moments, of course, and I love learning, but school is a place of stress for me. It is a constant uphill battle; I can’t procrastinate and I won’t go to parties. My downhill is the weekend, and even then I spend the majority of my time working.

I am happy that my old acquantaince whom I will probably never see or speak to again is so happy with her choice. She’s a nice person and she meant well. But her tweet did irk me. I didn’t pick the wrong college. I just see college and home differently than you do.

And I think that’s okay. I don’t have to LOVE every part of college to know that it’s better than high school and that it’s helping me reach my goals. I am not going to love or even enjoy lots of things in my life, but that doesn’t mean I am not going to get them done.

That life lesson was so long that I’m not even sure it made sense. Long story short: Don’t feel bad if/when your peers seem to be doing better than you are. You’re probably doing just fine and simply seeing things a little differently.

That’s all for this week! I don’t have any exams this week for you to wish me luck on, but I do have a terrifyingly long and complicated lab tomorrow so please send your good vibes for that.


Emily G.

1 thought on “And I am already back to the grind

  1. Good job doing you, Emily. Keep on. Yay for no exams this week, boo for long labs. I didn’t realize you only had two regular weeks of class left. That went fast.

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