I usually write my posts while I’m walking around Cambridge Community, and I tried to do that, but my fingers got too cold (it’s 42 degrees!) so now I am doing my laps on the baby track in Eppley (the gym at my school). I couldn’t sleep last night because it’s hella hot in my dorm–it’s 82 in my room and I have no control of the thermostat. To make things worse it’s so humid that the moisture in the air is basically palpable. We opened the window, and that helped some, but I hope it gets better throughout the day because I don’t feel comfortable leaving the window open all night (noise and bugs). Speaking of noise, they do not tell you when you go to college that residence halls are loud as heck. People on my floor were partying with their doors open until about 1am, which was incredibly pleasant for me, as you may imagine.
Last Wednesday the top of my left foot (towards the back) hurt during my usual 8 mile run, but it kind of went away as I continued, so I kept running. Afterwards my foot was very, very angry at me. I was limpy all that day and the next day (on which I biked instead of running). On Friday I was still semi-limpy when I came home for my podiatrist appointment. The doctor said I probably tweaked a nerve in my foot. I don’t really have any idea how I could have done that, but he prescribed me painkillers and ointment, neither of which I used. He told me to skip my 20 on Sunday and not run, so I just did 12 instead and suffered little repurcussions. Today it hurts a little bit but not bad enough to take an acetominophin, so I call that a success. I was supposed to do 20 yesterday, 12 next week, 8 the week after that, and then Marine Corps. My new plan is to do 15/16 next week, 8 the week after that, and then the marathon. Fingers crossed there are no more bumps in the road!
This week was a mess. I am still sick (going on week three!) and coughing and dying all the time. I had two midterms and a 7 page essay due, in addition to a whole bunch of readings and other smaller assignments. On top of all that I had to worry about my foot and change and wash my bedding and do all of my packing to come home very last minute. The weekend was an improvement but I still had to do about 15 hours of homework 🙁 I am experiencing the same feeling I did mid-semester the last two years: I feel like I am just working indefinitely with no end in sight and little to look forward to. Time is too cyclical: every Thursday I am happy it’s almost the weekend, but then I blink and it’s Monday again. And while weekends at home are a nice change of pace, Saturday nights are almost as sad as they are fun, because as they come to a close I know I won’t have true free time again for an entire week. It’s hard to be Emily G.
Ok, life lessons.
Life Lesson #1: There are many people who go to hell
I can’t think of a truly meaningful life lesson right now, but over the last week I have been mentally compiling a list of all the different kinds of people who will eventually suffer the consequences of their actions. Of course I do not actually mean they are going to hell, because most of these offenses are small, but I do believe that these people have some bad karma coming their way.
Here is an imcomplete list of people who are bad:
- people who don’t study and then do better than me on the exam
- people who try to throw their trash into the bin like a basketball player, and then leave it on the floor when they miss
- people who heavily procrastinate and then blame the teacher/professor for assigning an unacceptable amount of work (surprise! It wasn’t meant to be done in one night)
- people who think the fact that Hillary Clinton didn’t leave Bill after Monica Lewinsky has anything to do with her ability to hold office
- people in front of me at Smoothie King that ask a million questions and try to pay in coins
- people who are mean to my Prius
- boys that call all of their ex-girlfriends “crazy” after they get dumped
- people who think HIMYM is better than Friends
- people who think Obama is uncool
- people who are mean to plants (why tear leaves off trees? What could you possibly need them for?)
- people who are mean to ants (purposefully destroying anthills is just rude)
- men who catcall women and think it’s a compliment
That’s all I can think of right now, but I am sure there are more offensive people in the world whose actions I have been lucky enough never to witness.
Life Lesson #2: “The more things seem to change, the more they stay the same”
As I adjust to college life, I am frequently surprised by how similar my new life is to my old one. I would make a venn diagram but unfortunately I am not at my laptop right now. Instead I will have to simply describe the ways in which my college life is similar and different to my high school life. Sure, I live in a new place with new people instead of my family. But, like before, I am limited in space and constantly unimpressed by bathroom conditions. I still go to bed around the same time and get up around the same time; now I just have to worry about how that schedule affects the other person living in my limited space. I still, for the most part, avoid large, youthful social events, but I see my friends once a day for dinner (which is more than I can say for last year). I cry less here because there is nowhere to cry; privacy is a privilege rather than a guarantee when you live with 700 other students. I still run a lot and bike a lot, but now I am bound by the dumb hours of Eppley and the sunrise rather than by the dumb hours of school. I spend less time in class, but still find difficulty carving any time out for myself. Like before, there is always a sense of urgency. There is always something to do or be overwhelmed by. There are still days that I am sure will never pass; there are still assignments I am sure will be the end of me and my sanity.
But this is where I have the advantage: I have been working like this and feeling like this for over two years. Stress is my best friend. I am used to being overwhelmed and challenged, and so far, I always come out alive. A lot of my friends and acquaintances have a lot more work to do in the adjusting-to-college field–they don’t know how to properly study or manage time or keep themselves on track. I have no doubt they will all acquire these skills with time, but it’s nice that I don’t have to.
This is another field in which my introversion is a benefit to me; I require much less social interaction than most people to feel satisfied and content. I prefer short, small group events that I am free to leave at any time. These events take a whole lot less time than frat parties and chainsmoking, giving me more time to study. Now, maybe I have adapted over time to prioritize study time over social time, but there is a good chance that a high percentage of human personalities are determined before birth. So I would like to give my genes a personal shout-out for saving me so much time while still allowing me to feel healthy and whole.
Alright, internet, I think that’s all for now! Please wish me luck for lab tomorrow and for my mid-term on Friday. Please send me a sense of purpose because I seem to have misplaced mine and would very much like to rid myself of the working-tirelessly-for-no-reason feeling.